dead body

i receive MOEI's message lastnite..
when i saw the message..the depression was there again...
thanks moei...

Maybe trying to escape something from it..
I can't control to mind the problem..
same thing..' follow' the unhappy..
"'ve read...yes...it's true, who are bestfriend? Obviously...
erm..how can i describe my feelings now?
can I say it's very contradiction(矛盾)?
I am trying to control my self not to think about it..
but...when i know that ...unhappy, i will follow too...
figure out something? yes,bad things always happen on me

Many event was happening on me nonstoply..
breakup..car hang...lost hp...quarreling...
I wonder when my bad destiny will get the END

sometimes,i rather be a DUMB or DEAF
I now just like a corpse(dead body)